12 KEYS TO A LASTING MARRIAGE

12 KEYS TO A LASTING MARRIAGE 

There is no accidental success or satisfaction in marriage. There is nothing like, "Oh you're lucky that, your marriage is successful." Every marriage that succeeds or lasts for a long time doesn't just happen by accident, a lot of work has to be done behind the scenes.

For your marriage to last, you must do something about it because the success or longevity of any marriage depends on the couple . Your marriage is what you make of it. The quality of your marriage rests on your shoulders.

Marriages don't last long these days and a lot of things are responsible for that. The life expectancy of marriages these days is between a month to five years. It's quite alarming. The global divorce rate is scarily crazy. 

So, if you're single, engaged or married, you need to know these things I'm about to share with you. These are the things that make marriage to lasts...

1. Compatibility 

The marriage that lasts is one where the couple is compatible to and with each other. 

According to a survey, lack of compatibility is the leading cause of marriage break ups globally. 

So, the marriage that lasts is the one where the couples are compatible, compatible in belief system, values, purpose, vision, dreams, ambitions, hobbies, interests, preferences etc. When there's no compatibility, there will be lots of irreconcilable differences and if not well handled will lead to the end of the marriage. 

Don't joke with this nor allow love to deceive you, two can't walk together except there's an agreement. It's not possible. 

2. God Factor 

The marriage that lasts is the one that has the God factor. God is the Custodian and Source of marriage and no marriage will last on the long run without His input. Nothing survives without its source. 

Many people are neglecting God and His instructions concerning marriage. I wonder how they expect the thing to last. Give God (the real head of the family) His place in your marriage and watch miracles happen. 

3. Understanding 

Understanding means to get, comprehend or grasp the meaning of something. So, you must understand your partner, the differences between you both, their likes and dislikes, dos and don'ts, the things that piss them off and avoid them. You must also understand their feelings, worries and complains. It's a full-time job and also a process. It doesn't happen once. 

4. Tolerance 

Tolerance is an important skill anyone must learn, not just those getting married. You must learn how to allow, ignore or overlook some things if you want your marriage to lasts. It's not every single matter you must say something about. 

Your partner is going to be naughty at times that you will be wondering how you ended up with such a person but you must learn how to allow, ignore or overlook the naughtiness. If you're the type that doesn't tolerate, you will tear your marriage in no time. 

5. Endurance 

The marriage that lasts is the one where there is endurance. We have a lot of impatient folks rushing into marriage expecting everything to be rosy, lovey dovey etc. Sorry to disappoint you, it's not going to be like that all the time. Every marriage has its high and low moments. You enjoy the high moments and endure the low moments. 

Sometimes, you have to endure and be patient with your partner to stop a particular habit or behavior. Sometimes, you have to endure in times of sickness etc. 

6. Teamwork

Marriage is about agreement, teamwork. It's about two people working together for a mutual and a common goal. 

Competing to be better than your partner shows you're foolish because marriage is not a place for competition but teamwork. So, you must learn to carry your partner along. You must delete from your vocabulary the word "I" and starting using the word "We."

It takes teamwork to make dreams work. 

7. Sacrifice 

Sacrifice is the emblem of marriage. It means giving up yourself for your partner. Sometimes, you will have to give up your happiness, comfort for the sake of your marriage. If you are the selfish type, you will not last long in marriage. Selfish people don't last long in marriage. 

8. Forgiveness 

Don't even bother to get married if you are the type that finds it difficult to forgive.

Your partner will offend you often mostly unintentional. You must learn to forgive. You learn to let go of the anger, the resentment, the bitterness etc., if you want to last in marriage.

9. Fun 

Marriage is not a battleground. So, when there's fun in marriage, there won't be boredom and people won't get tired of such a marriage easily.

Many people are just enduring unnecessarily in marriage. No fun, nothing. Everything seems to be predictable. Boring! You must create time for fun. Eat out sometimes, travel sometimes, go see a movie, play, joke and laugh.

10. Effective Communication 

Effective communication is the ability to communicate your thoughts or feelings to your partner, minding your choice of words, tone of your voice, etc.

Many people have destroyed their marriages with their mouths. They don't know how to communicate to and with their partner concerning issues bothering them. 

So, effective communication is an act you must learn if you want your marriage to last. You must learn how to communicate properly. You must learn how not to let your emotions get in the way. 

11. Love

Love is a strong feeling you have for someone which makes you do things to better the life of the person you love. Even though loving someone is not enough reason to marry but no marriage will last without love. Love is like a foundation, without it marriage will be shaky. 

Love your partner. 

12. Trust 

You must learn to love and to trust who you marry because no marriage survives without these two things here. They're crucial. When you don't love or trust, you can't give your partner your best neither can you receive the best from your partner. God so loved the world and He gave us His best, His Son.

There maybe other things but here are the basic ones: God, compatibility, understanding, tolerance, forgiveness, teamwork, sacrifice, endurance, love, trust, communication, etc.

May you have a fulfilling and lasting marriage in Jesus name, Amen!